life – Page 2 – Journey with Damian

Do you remember the moment sometime last year where we felt hopeful and inspired to start afresh in 2019? We then proceeded to jot down our goals for the year and went into the year feeling that 2019 will be a defining year.

Fast forward to the end of 2019, I guess it felt like de jevu, all over again, back to reviewing the past year, goal setting and encouraging ourselves that the new year will bring new changes.

Some of our goals will be achieved while others will seem like a “failure”. Personally, I did achieve some of mine but I remind myself not to put myself down for not achieving the rest.

There is a fine line in making sure that we are accountable to our commitments and goals and bashing ourselves and making it more than it should be, thus demoralising our own spirit.

So this post is just a quick reminder on the importance of goals, an honest reflection and the way forward.

1. Goals

As the name suggests, they define our goal posts, areas for us to score, so that we know we have achieved something. Without them, we would be aimless. Thus, to have a successful year, we have to be clear with what we want to achieve.

2. Reflection

Reflecting on our past years help us identify bumps on the roads that caused us to not reach our target and goals. Reflecting gives us perspectives and at times, takes away the subconscious guilt that we do place on ourselves for not achieving something. Reflection (honest one) gives us knowledge and power to set us up for probable success in the new year ahead.

3. Way Forward

The simplest way would be to list a new sets of goals for the new year. However, a more effective way and efficient one would be to use the information gathered from our reflections (point 2) and implement strategies to help us cope and ensure the rate of success in achieving our goals rises.

Every “failure” and moments of work are great learning experiences. While many of us (in this perfectionist and well informed society) may not like the trial and error process, great inventions and moment of brilliance in life were still products of this timeless strategy. We should never let lack of information or the need for a perfect strategy stop us from moving forward.

I guess the best way to look at 2020 is to head into it with renewed hope, an improved strategy, and the guts and tenacity to do our best to make it better than 2019.

When things do not go right, we always have the tendency to do one thing – complain. This is the first response for most of us humans.

This is unfortunate because not only is it counterproductive, complaining usually makes us feel worse off emotionally.

Why do we “like” to complain or choose to complain? I guess it is because it is the easiest thing to do. It kinda gives us the justification that the next logical step to take is not from us, our end but that someone or something that we are complaining about. It gives us a reason to not think creatively because the issue is not with us, or so we would love to think.

When an employee does not perform as required, it is not uncommon to see employers blaming them for their incompetence but seldom see them take ownership and reflect if their instructions to their employees were clear enough. Complaining helps defray the complainant’s responsibility from having to take proactive actions.

So what is the alternative?

Without complicating it unnecessarily, it is as simple as take a step back, reflect and look for avenues where you can make a change or tweak to effect a better outcome. Instead of asking why, learn to ask what? Instead of why is he or why the external is the cause, ask what can I, the only constant in the equation, do in future to facilitate a more favourable outcome.

In the example above, instead of blaming the employee for his incompetence, look for areas where you can guide him towards effective work. This is, of course, taking into consideration that the individual is willing to commit to learn.

Lesser complaints also make us happier human beings. It saves us from unnecessary emotions that do not serve anyone, especially the complainant.

It is not easy but it is not hard either. It is a habit and the more we practice it, the better we become at it!

Tag: life

An Honest Review for 2019

Resist the temptation to COMPLAIN (Always Forward Series Part 3)