Resist the temptation to COMPLAIN (Always Forward Series Part 3)

When things do not go right, we always have the tendency to do one thing – complain. This is the first response for most of us humans.

This is unfortunate because not only is it counterproductive, complaining usually makes us feel worse off emotionally.

Why do we “like” to complain or choose to complain? I guess it is because it is the easiest thing to do. It kinda gives us the justification that the next logical step to take is not from us, our end but that someone or something that we are complaining about. It gives us a reason to not think creatively because the issue is not with us, or so we would love to think.

When an employee does not perform as required, it is not uncommon to see employers blaming them for their incompetence but seldom see them take ownership and reflect if their instructions to their employees were clear enough. Complaining helps defray the complainant’s responsibility from having to take proactive actions.

So what is the alternative?

Without complicating it unnecessarily, it is as simple as take a step back, reflect and look for avenues where you can make a change or tweak to effect a better outcome. Instead of asking why, learn to ask what? Instead of why is he or why the external is the cause, ask what can I, the only constant in the equation, do in future to facilitate a more favourable outcome.

In the example above, instead of blaming the employee for his incompetence, look for areas where you can guide him towards effective work. This is, of course, taking into consideration that the individual is willing to commit to learn.

Lesser complaints also make us happier human beings. It saves us from unnecessary emotions that do not serve anyone, especially the complainant.

It is not easy but it is not hard either. It is a habit and the more we practice it, the better we become at it!

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Rise above unfairness

Do you know that there is a great equaliser for the “unfairness” that many seems to be complaining about?

What is more beautiful is that this equaliser is in all of us!

So what is this great equaliser?

*Drums roll*

POWER OF CHOICE

You heard it right! It is the power of Choice! And I am going to explain why, so it will be placed in the right perspective for you to gain this liberating power.

Say you are working in a company where the boss shows unreasonable favoritism to a particular colleague. Not only that, the worse thing that could happened is that this colleague of yours hate you so badly, maybe because of your effective work planning. The thing is because of your effectiveness, it takes more effort for her to continue being the great worker in the eyes of the boss.

Adding on to the fact that the boss never appreciates your effectiveness, you wonder how you can rise above this unfair situation.

This is when the power of Choice comes in handy. Instead of feeling defeated and negative about the situation, you always have a choice to change the course and re-write your story. You can either have a genuine talk with this boss and find out whether you are in his long term plan or you can realize that enough is enough, you are going to start looking for a place that values your contribution. Either way, you are making proactive steps towards your success.

So when unfairness abound, know that you always have an equaliser, and that is your power of choice. Having said that, do note that this equaliser gets more valuable and effective when you invest in yourself and start to increase your skills and differentiate yourself from the rest. The more skillful you get, the more effective your power.

The power is in you to overcome many things. The more you invest in yourself, the more powerful you get.

Don’t let anyone belittle your contribution. No matter how small it may seem at this present moment, it is bringing value to the bigger picture of life. Will share more on this in a separate post.

Have a beautiful week ahead!