An uplifting account with Murphy’s Law

Just wanna pen down the thoughts that ran through my head, and the emotions that accompanied them this afternoon, so that it can seek to be a good reminder to myself in the near future, and hopefully, it would be able to encourage others who may be dealing with a similar situation.

“Anything that can go wrong will go wrong.”

It is easy to encourage others when you are not the one in a situation. But here I am, in one such situation. I decided not to waste this experience or the thoughts and emotions, so the best way to capture them is through this post.

Thankfully, whatever that I am experiencing is in the area of work. Having said that, I take a lot pride in my work and put in a lot of effort into them. Sometimes, bending towards the unhealthy side of it, eg. replying email on the wee hours of the morning.

The point is not to tell you how hardworking I am. Rather it is to show you that, even though whatever that I am going through has to do with work, it means a lot to me too.

Briefly, the issues that brought me to feel like I am stuck in Murphy’s Law can be summed up in the points below:

  1. Almost at the end point of a major win (amicable closure), only to have a rep share that their group decided to take another stance
  2. Almost at the point of signing a deal based on terms agreed prior (with a prospect that we have been following up for quite a while) but due to unfortunate event, ie. Covid19, a re-negotiation was requested
  3. Due to Covid-19, a lot of operational issues were affected, as works were delayed due to the phased restart

It is frustrating and disappointing and these emotions are totally understandable. All the team’s hard work stood at the precipice of “failure”.

As I was driving back this evening, I reminded myself the following and I felt better immediately:

  • Is the situation I am in within my control or influence?
    I have to be honest here. Situations are not always a result of our choices. When it is not within our control, there is basically nothing much we can do to change it significantly. However, if we can still influence it, that would be helpful. If we can’t, then it is usually futile to be too bogged down emotionally and mentally by it. We should move on to the next few steps.
  • Adjust my expectations
    I should not expect perfections, despite one’s meticulous and thorough considerations. Expectations are useful guides towards an ideal outcome but it should never be the determinant of success.
  • Take stock of the situation
    It is important to review the new situation and honestly highlight the areas that are problematic. It is also equally important to look for areas that may still be favourable, so that we can pivot and build from them.
  • Look for viable alternatives
    As with all sound management techniques, it is never about running a perfect machine. The machine will never be perfect but we have to go through rounds and rounds of improvement to perfect it. Thus, in such situations, we have to take a step back, having identified key areas of problems and areas that are favourable, and proactively and creatively find new strategies to overcome the current situation.
  • Be prepared to manage the worst
    Despite our best efforts, sometimes things just do not work out the way it should or how we hoped for. And even then, we should not be defeated because, with all honesty and efforts, we did what we could. It is what it is. We just have to manage the outcomes as best as we can, and continue to give our best.

At the end of the day, I reminded myself that we did all that we could previously, and things will not always be smooth. We should embrace challenges because there is no ways around it, just like the world or even ourselves will never perfect.

We cannot and should allow ourselves to be defeated because in doing so, we are disabling ourselves, not giving ourselves a chance to change the course out of the situation, thus, allowing a self-prophecy to play out – failure.

An Honest Review for 2019

Do you remember the moment sometime last year where we felt hopeful and inspired to start afresh in 2019? We then proceeded to jot down our goals for the year and went into the year feeling that 2019 will be a defining year.

Fast forward to the end of 2019, I guess it felt like de jevu, all over again, back to reviewing the past year, goal setting and encouraging ourselves that the new year will bring new changes.

Some of our goals will be achieved while others will seem like a “failure”. Personally, I did achieve some of mine but I remind myself not to put myself down for not achieving the rest.

There is a fine line in making sure that we are accountable to our commitments and goals and bashing ourselves and making it more than it should be, thus demoralising our own spirit.

So this post is just a quick reminder on the importance of goals, an honest reflection and the way forward.

1. Goals

As the name suggests, they define our goal posts, areas for us to score, so that we know we have achieved something. Without them, we would be aimless. Thus, to have a successful year, we have to be clear with what we want to achieve.

2. Reflection

Reflecting on our past years help us identify bumps on the roads that caused us to not reach our target and goals. Reflecting gives us perspectives and at times, takes away the subconscious guilt that we do place on ourselves for not achieving something. Reflection (honest one) gives us knowledge and power to set us up for probable success in the new year ahead.

3. Way Forward

The simplest way would be to list a new sets of goals for the new year. However, a more effective way and efficient one would be to use the information gathered from our reflections (point 2) and implement strategies to help us cope and ensure the rate of success in achieving our goals rises.

Every “failure” and moments of work are great learning experiences. While many of us (in this perfectionist and well informed society) may not like the trial and error process, great inventions and moment of brilliance in life were still products of this timeless strategy. We should never let lack of information or the need for a perfect strategy stop us from moving forward.

I guess the best way to look at 2020 is to head into it with renewed hope, an improved strategy, and the guts and tenacity to do our best to make it better than 2019.