Some reflections…

The first few days of the new year have been sweet! I even chanced upon my sister’s blog. I never knew that she has one! I never even thought that she would start one! Ha! How wrong was I!? As I was reading her blog, I was deeply sadden to see how much she is suffering in her relationship. I posted some comments to encourage her and I really understand how she feels.

Like her, I guess we are both extremely emotional creatures. I understand that everyone has emotions. Ours, however, are abit more intense and hard to shake off. If it goes to the extreme, we will even become very insecure and negatives thoughts will eventually enter our minds. I have always wonder why I am so emotional… Why can’t I be like some others, who do not have to go through these emotional turmoils. Some people tend to take things so easily. Yes, you may say that they are positive and all. I am too! =) In fact, I have been exercising that too! However, emotions are still there to bother me! I chose to ignore it but the thoughts kept barraging! I remained positive and tried to deflect them. In the end, the constant barraging will just overwhelm me.

I guess I should not be focusing on the fact that I am emotional. I should, instead, focus on how to deal or prevent these negative thoughts from getting near to me. I am still clueless. Whenever I am overwhelmed, I would turn to God. Apart from Him, I really do not know who to turn to. He never fails! Whenever I am defeated, He would take away the pain and at times, He would make me forget about why I became so emotional! Ha… There are even times when I tried to recall because I just want to wallow in my own misery and really have a good cry over it, but it was too hard… the memories just could not be found!

I am currently learning how to start leaning on God not only at the moment of defeat but at the moment of attack. He is my Shelter, my Refuge my Portion forever! I am hopeful, like always, that I will be strong. I hate myself for being so emotional but I do also accept me for who I am!

Negative emotions are killers! They can really bring you to places so dark that you cannot even find any hope. Nevertheless, there is hope! God is my hope and my source of strength. I have been through these emotional patches or dark valleys so many times that I have learnt how to look for Him and where to look for Him whenever I am in it. Never once had He failed to deliver me. It may not be immediately at times but I am always grateful that for the wretched man that I am, He always come true for me! Praise God!

I am definitely not looking forward to these emotional roller-coasters but if they do come, I will face them HEAD ON, with my shielf of faith and my sword of the Spirit!

Lord, I pray for strength when emotions hit me! I know that you, being the Almighty God, is able to bring me out of rugs and that Your love will fill me when I am in need of it! Lord, I also want to pray for my sister. Though, she has not really proclaim You her personal Savior, I prayed that, being the Merciful God, You will lift her up and refresh her soul. Enlighten her about Your love and Your everlasting desire to want us back in Your arms, happy. Thank you Lord for Your love and your strength!

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