“If you are secured without yourself, you treat it very, very lightly. Because you asked yourself, ‘Am I really afraid of that man, or is that man, do I have any doubt within me that he’s gonna get me?’ But if I do not have such doubt, and if I do not have such fear, I would certainly treat very lightly.”
We are all on different missions and goals in our lives. Some of us have huge dreams that we would love to see it come to past. However, many of us are not yet satisfied at where we are at right now, including me. We are not exactly lousy or incompetent. We know we are good ENOUGH. But what exactly is stopping us from getting from where we are now to where we want to be? It is none other than doubt.
Why Do We Doubt?
It is human nature to be conservative. In fact, the only reason why successful people are successful is because they are willing to take certain risks in their lives. It was a do or die for many of them.
So why is it that we doubt? It is simple! Apart from those successful stories, which are the minority relative to the total population in the world, there are many who have tried and failed. These failures cause doubt to creep in. Instead of reaching forward, “lessons” from these failures cause many to back off and choose the “simpler” life, the more conservative one.
The reason why we doubt is because we do not want to experience failure, or to be laughed at and despised.
How Do We Fuel it?
You know what’s worse than doubting? By doubting even further and by feeding it. How do we feed it?
Every time when you compare yourself to someone else and think that you are not as good as him, or that you have not achieved as much, you are feeding your doubts. It makes you feel lesser of yourself, and makes you feel worse.
I am guilty of this too. However, I know too well that by doing this, I am only making it worse. I have been in situations where I have let this eat into me. I gave up on relationships just because I think that I am not good enough, and that someone else is better than me. This is a self-fulfilling prophecy. It always happen the way you think. Not because you are not good enough but because you ALLOW yourself to not be good enough.
How to Overcome it?
This is the key, the most important part of this entire post. You overcome your doubt and dominate it by making yourself secure. Instead of feeding the doubts, build on small victories, build up your confidence, not in your skills or knowledge but in YOURSELF.
Instead of telling yourself that something or someone is better than yourself, try to work towards bettering yourself. You may not be as good but that does not mean that you are not good enough!
The key here is not to be the best at every thing, so as to overcome doubt. Rather, it is about being secure in yourself, having an assurance that even if you may not be the best at the moment, you know that you are GOOD ENOUGH, and that NO ONE or NOTHING can tell you otherwise. When there is support, you know you have strength. You can be YOUR support!
There is NO POINT in comparison. Just make sure that you are working on yourself, and that you are improving every SINGLE DAY! What matters is that you are better today as compared to yesterday.
Start building on your confidence and self-worth. When we feel that we are worth it, no one can tell us otherwise. It can get lonely reaching the top or to be successful, but hey, no one says that it is going to be easy, not if you want to experience greatness.
I am definitely going to build on my confidence. I am going to challenge myself to say that I am good enough, and that I am worth it every time.
I really hope that this post is helpful to you. I know it is revelational to me. My mind got opened up as the writing unfolds. I am thankful. If ever you feel doubt, I hope that you can read back to this post and remind yourself SIMPLY that you are GOOD ENOUGH.
Success is not easy. Don’t let anyone sell you on the lie that it is. It is a constant battle between what you want and how much you are willing to fight for it. Success may not happen on the first few tries but if you let doubt set in and stop you on your tracks, it is guaranteed that you will never be successful.
Wishing you success always.
Damian (Follow me on my Twitter – @ithewinner)
Here is the link on some of the successful people who failed at first: